It’s Christmas time and usually I’m pretty happy during the holidays but for some reason last year I had a bad case of the blues. It hit me on the day of my family’s annual get together. I don’t know what it was but I was engulfed in this unattractive feeling of sadness and loneliness before I got there and after I arrived it got worse. As I looked around the room at my cousins, aunts and uncles, etc. I realized that I was the only one there without an immediate family. Everyone else had a significant other, children or both to share their Christmas joy with. I was in a room full of people but I felt this intense loneliness. I didn’t understand why I was unhappy during a time I should have been elated. I have a wonderful family and I was surrounded by people who loved me. Needless to say, I realized that I didn’t need to be there and left. No matter what we did I wasn’t going to enjoy myself that evening. I retreated to the security blanket of my home. Once I arrived, I was faced with the decision of what to do to ease my current state. I had three choices:
A. Make a phone call and allow some attractive man to temporarily relieve my loneliness for the evening
B. Continue to wallow in my sadness and eventually cry myself to sleep
C. Own my situation, accept it for what it is and get over it
I chose C. The life I live is a direct result of choices I’ve made. I consciously decided not to have any children without a husband. I have nothing against single parents. My mother was a single parent but I decided very early in my life I didn’t want to be one. I want to give my children something I didn’t have----a two parent home. I want to be able to share the experience of parenthood with a wonderful man who lives in the same house with us. I want to be able to tell my children “go ask your daddy” simply because I’m busy and don’t feel like answering their question right then. LOL
In order to have a happy loving marriage and a great environment in which to parent children I have to have the right man for me and I haven’t met him, yet. If I have, he hasn’t revealed himself to me as a prospective mate. Or may he has---I'll keep you posted. However, I am 100% sure I'm going to get married and have a child as some point. I’m an optimist, pessimism is counterproductive. I simply cannot and will not let the devil steal my joy with thoughts of loneliness, failure and inadequacy. God has been too good to me. I'm blessed and I know it! So, if you’re like me and waiting for the special someone to share your love and life with I encourage you to find joy in what you have now while continuing to rejoice in the knowledge that God is faithful. He has not forgotten you and he will give you the desires of your heart. However ladies, we must be patient. Blessings aren’t delivered on our time but our Heavenly Father who loves us dearly. After all, Christmas is a celebration of His greatest gift to us, His son Jesus. It's not about you anyway!!
I’m pleased to say I am in a much better mood this year. Our annual get together is tonight and I can’t wait to see my family. Happy holidays to you and yours!
A. Make a phone call and allow some attractive man to temporarily relieve my loneliness for the evening
B. Continue to wallow in my sadness and eventually cry myself to sleep
C. Own my situation, accept it for what it is and get over it
I chose C. The life I live is a direct result of choices I’ve made. I consciously decided not to have any children without a husband. I have nothing against single parents. My mother was a single parent but I decided very early in my life I didn’t want to be one. I want to give my children something I didn’t have----a two parent home. I want to be able to share the experience of parenthood with a wonderful man who lives in the same house with us. I want to be able to tell my children “go ask your daddy” simply because I’m busy and don’t feel like answering their question right then. LOL
In order to have a happy loving marriage and a great environment in which to parent children I have to have the right man for me and I haven’t met him, yet. If I have, he hasn’t revealed himself to me as a prospective mate. Or may he has---I'll keep you posted. However, I am 100% sure I'm going to get married and have a child as some point. I’m an optimist, pessimism is counterproductive. I simply cannot and will not let the devil steal my joy with thoughts of loneliness, failure and inadequacy. God has been too good to me. I'm blessed and I know it! So, if you’re like me and waiting for the special someone to share your love and life with I encourage you to find joy in what you have now while continuing to rejoice in the knowledge that God is faithful. He has not forgotten you and he will give you the desires of your heart. However ladies, we must be patient. Blessings aren’t delivered on our time but our Heavenly Father who loves us dearly. After all, Christmas is a celebration of His greatest gift to us, His son Jesus. It's not about you anyway!!
I’m pleased to say I am in a much better mood this year. Our annual get together is tonight and I can’t wait to see my family. Happy holidays to you and yours!
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